Weapons with grace and love!

Well it will soon be son number 2s birthday! I am a bit behind in preparations this year with regards to presents so i took a morning visit to Toys r us.  I asked my son what he would like for his birthday and he informed me 'I'd really like some more weapons and a light sabre'  This is so 'not' me.  With my shopping trolley of weaponry, I saw a little book that I would have really enjoyed playing with as a young girl.  It was a cut out paper doll dress up in bridal theme - fills all my girly passions and delights.  However this would fill my sons with complete disgust!

I was there looking at all these different guns, cross bows and swords, trying to determine which will be the most fun and not poke out too many eye balls or cause too much devastation in the home - thinking about how I arrived here.  He really wants to be a spy and loves the notion of good verses evil.  He likes to play superhero and is very much a boys boy in terms of how he plays.  He also has a very soft and loving side, which is not so easily seen - as he's running around bustling with energy at being a superhero! But he is really sensitive and considerate to others - he may not always show this in the best way but it is there. He enjoys hugs and kisses, they just come with heaps of energy and squeezes. 

I remembered back to when i had my first child and how different my opinions about boys and how they should be raised were. I was raising my son vegetarian and how much I hated superhero and gun type toys. I did not want to raise a violent over-active child and felt this type of play was the cause. I thought it would numb their mind towards violence and make them insensitive.  I wanted a son that would quietly play and be interested in a wide range of (what i deemed suitable) activities.  Well I soon came to realise, in raising my sons, I do not get to choose who they are - yes we guide them as parents but God has chosen them and made them who they are. I do not want to be an over controlling mother (believing i am author of their souls) by not allowing Gods design and potential to be reached.  We now all eat meat (in fact its getting them to eat the veggies that can be harder) and have learned to accept boys (mainly son number 2) really enjoy being superhero and actually they get a lot of joy from these games.  I can see their moral compass, their need for justice and helping others through their play.  I know they need lots of energy and will eventually learn how to harvest that for their careers/future/daily lives. 

I do not know the plans God has for my children but through them I have learnt to humble my opinions and submit them to God.  Through my sons i have learnt more about men and biblical masculinity.  I have learnt and read more about this, so I can understand and raise them up to be men of God.  Its also helped me to appreciate and understand my husband more.  Jon is more than happy to play the rough and tumble games, enjoys a game of Nerf wars, to him it is natural - for me i need to learn.  Also I have learnt its not their toys that matter or influence the type of person they will become.  I am learning more about parenting and how playing is very important but just a small part of a much bigger picture.  So although I would really like to get son number 2 some more 'appropriate educational' toys, I am at the checkout buying an array of weaponry - a machine gun or 2, with grace and love.

Toddler Love

Well my youngest is 18 months and is in full swing of life.  I love him to bits!  I love how he is so curious to explore life and is in to everything.  To him, everything is an adventure and needs to be explored/tasted or climbed on - sometimes all 3 at the same time.  Its a different routine that's now needed, to keep him out of mischief, safe and entertained.

Keeping him safe, yet allowing him to explore.  Teaching him rights and wrongs, as well as letting him experience life.  He points, waves, dances, climbs, moves, says a few words, does animal noises and sings.  Everything is approached in full throttle with lots of energy.  He is a bit shy around other adults, preferring the company of mummy and daddy but hoping this clingy stage won't last long.  I love how he climbs onto your lap and says 'row row'  letting you know 'now' is the time for 'row row your boat' - regardless of your plans.  I love how he happily hugs and kisses you and is delighted to see you.  I love seeing life through his eyes.

This stage has so many adorable moments but is also very time consuming.  Tasks have to be laid aside until later or take twice the time (as you involve them), your eyes and ears are on the look out constantly, as you keep your curious toddler safe.  Its also a time of training, both for myself in consistency and for him in learning to obey.  This will be an ongoing lesson... even as an adult I'm still learning to obey God and not rely on my own self dependence.

I have recently read - Jo Frosts 'Confident Toddler Care' - this book is brilliant and takes you through every aspect of toddler hood.  I was dubious at first (i borrowed the book from the library) as I didn't like her supernanny book.  This is because I didn't find it helpful, easy to apply or inspiring but this book is different - much better. 

Jo Frost also recommends certain toys and books, helpfully categorised by ages for the under 5s, which I also agree with too (i have read quite a few children's books and played with a lot of toys).  Even though I'm 4th time round into toddler hood, i really enjoyed this book.  It was not patronising but clear, detailed and interesting. I like how she casually included in each section what to expect for each age.  A lot of the topics and ideas in the book, i have learnt along my parenting journey (wish she'd written the book earlier to save on some mistakes) but also some new things to try, as I seek to improve my parenting skills.  The book has inspired me in parenting my 2 under 5s with new enthusiasm!  With so many resources/books now available, I have found this the most helpful and the most thorough, from emotional journeys and routines to eating, discipline to sleeping, fussy eating to potty training - She has covered all the bases!  Its a book I'd refer to again and keep on the book shelf.  If you have the opportunity to read it - do!

Happy New Year

Well 2011 has not been an easy year.  When I was reflecting back, I was thinking about how glad I was to see the back of 2011 and that 2012 couldn't arrive soon enough.

I do like to review the year gone by, think about what we have done and learnt, what we can do differently next year.  I sat in bed looking through my prayer journal and writing notes on the year.  I started to feel sad about how the lows of 2011, how they could have been opportunities to grow in faith if I had not been so stubborn in trusting God, instead of believing I knew how to handle things.  I wrote them all out and gave thanks to God for the lows.  Although I did not enjoy these experiences, I know through the challenging times, I am not alone that God does love and care for me, that He has a plan for me and will finish the work He has started.  I said sorry for my sins and then I could see the joys of this past year.  I also sat and gave praise for them.

Reflecting back helped me to see the repeating sins and the lessons God is teaching me.  Jon and I went through all of this and prayed over the past year and what we would like for 2012.  We then committed to making our new resolutions, plans and hopes with God, for this New Year.  I am looking forward to 2012 not just because of how I remembered 2011 but because of our hope in Jesus, sins forgiven and how Gods mercy towards us is refreshed each day.  Thank-you Lord for this new beginning!