Tuesday, 12 February 2013

The bugs!

Yes its been a little while, but thought it is time to dust off my keyboard and write a post!
Well its certainly been a busy few months, mainly battling with different illnesses, potty training a 2 year old and living life with a child on the spectrum, amongst lots of changes.  Since before Christmas someone has been ill in our household each week, sometimes this can be just a cold/cough or it is full on flu with a dash of different viruses, chicken pox and stomach upsets thrown in between. 
We are all taking our vitamins and Dettol has never been too far away, sanitising surfaces hoping to stop the spread of germs.  In some ways this has worked, as its not the same bug running through us,  as we have had different ones.
Each week has meant plans have gone awry as taking care of sick children/self or too tired to enjoy/participate as been up through the night looking after others.  This year it seems the everyday plans and schedules have gone to pot.  We've had lots of birthdays/parties/school trips/illnesses and absences which have disrupted schedules for my ASD son.  However I think he has coped really well. 
I am looking forward to half term, not because I think it will be easier but because it will be a change from where I'm at currently.  They say a change is as good as a rest. 
Normally i'm very organised and enjoy planning lots of things to do but because everything has been chaotic I have just had to go with the flow - I even bought a birthday cake for my son who turned 7.  Whilst this is, of course, not at all appalling I found it really challenging. I am used to taking time out and making my children their very own special birthday cake.  I like having the time to plan and do special things for them, to show my love but this year things were different.  I love my son just the same but just didn't have the time.  This year, I became very thankful for the big selection of cakes at Sainsburys.  My son of course is just happy to have cake and enjoyed choosing his cake.  I just felt I wasn't doing my best for him.  It made me look at myself and think about what I do and who its for - them or me? I have a perfectionist nature and think sometimes I just need to challenge that - at the end of the day what will really matter, then focus on that. 
Health is just something I have taken for granted and its been good to reflect on how important this is.  When something goes wrong it can have a massive impact on the everyday.  By the everyday, I mean the things I expect to do, (sometimes even moan about doing them) or do unnoticeably.  I have soon noticed how important these little tasks are when they don't get done, how out of sorts I can feel and how much comfort they give.  I guess its helped me to establish what's important and what I just like to do. 
My youngest has spent quite a bit of time with Cbeebies/Fireman Sam whilst I've been ill.  Far too much time, than I would normally allow but he hasn't gone off the rails and is still happy.  I think he actually really enjoys chilling out and just watching a bit of telly snuggling on the sofa with mummy.  Also amongst all of this, he is toilet trained and dry through the night, so maybe slowing down for a bit has helped him learn this skill.  It also means I have enjoyed the times I have been able to play with him more (maybe because it has appeased my guilt).
Although its not been fun with all these bugs at least I know they are temporary and that we will recover, its made me think of those with long term health problems and how difficult the everyday must be for them, everyday.  Through this time, I have been counting my blessings - even if I am just thankful that, that day has passed and can't come back again!

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