The House...

We have been living in our house, 4 years this December.  We bought it as a 'project'- we were going to turn this house into the perfect home for our family.  However anyone who has done a restoration project, with a large family and a full time job, will know that - things always go wrong, it takes a lot longer and costs more. 

The house had been used for residents with mental health problems, living on their own in the community.  Each floor had communal kitchen and 3 bedrooms with en-suites.  There was a communal lounge downstairs.  The house has now been converted back to a home, study, hall, lounge, kitchen/diner and playroom.  3 bedrooms and one family bathroom.  We were almost completed and then we had to stop to re-do the bathroom (due to problems with the bath taps which we discovered are irreplaceable). Not mentioning the garden....  The list is never ending.  Also we have been living in this house for almost 4 years now the things we had restored are now due a 'tidy up' and general maintenance is required.

When we first bought the house, I loved the idea of turning it into a home. I loved the design and shopping elements, I love knowing the house in its most basic state.  However, the reality of it all is really hard and emotional.  4 years on and I would just love a completed, normal, house.  I would love our money and time to be spent on something else!  The house is also my workplace, so I never escape it.  It feels as soon as one room is done it has been straight onto the next, whether its physically doing it or saving.  It has become an obsession and an idol.

I know wanting a completed house, in itself, is not a bad thing, but when that's the only thing you do and think about it, it is an act of worship - it becomes an idol.  The house had become an idol for me.  In learning to be more disciplined and godly I needed to put this down to rest.

At Westpoint, a man prophesied 'have faith to lay down your posessions' if I am to step away from our culture perceptions and follow Godly values, I need to step away from this obsession.  I came away and wrote down everything I wanted possession wise and everything I wanted done in the house.  I then prayed over all of this and lifted it to God.  I asked for forgiveness and for freedom to lay this down.  Gods Holy Spirit has really helped me.  I know that God has more planned for us, than how our house is presented.  I know God wants more for us than to spend our time and finances on the house.  As Matthew Hosier said to me 'In 500 years will your house still be standing, will it really of mattered?' I do find this hard to let go but there is a difference in looking after what you have been blessed with and letting it become obsessional.  Each time I get the feeling I maybe picking it back up, I re-read the notes from westpoint, pray and return to the cross.  I need freedom from this.

I'm looking forward to the new - A house which is not held higher than God but a place where we serve God, and is looked after accordingly. 

^{Exodus 20:4} "You shall not make for yourself a carved image, or any likeness of anything that is in heaven above, or that is in the earth beneath, or that is in the water under the earth. ⁵ You shall not bow down to them or serve them, for I the LORD your God am a jealous God, visiting the iniquity of the fathers on the children to the third and the fourth generation of those who hate me, ⁶but showing steadfast love to thousands^[b] of those who love me and keep my commandments.

Getting disciplined

Well this season we want to focus on God and this means getting disciplined.

Even the sound of the word makes me feel like groaning inside but the truth is to have freedom we need to be disciplined. For example if we want to be able to sit down and play any piece of music on the piano we must of first disciplined ourselves to practise and learn.  Its not easy and takes endurance.  I have found this book really good on outlining and explaining the spiritual disciplines for those of you interested in exploring this further.  My husband and I have been reading this book together and encouraging one another in spiritual disciplines.  Its not a particular easy or 'enjoyable' read but very informative and helpful.  (It is after all a book on spiritual disciplines).

I have started another blog as this is about me learning to be disciplined with food.  This is a personal project, I really need to have discipline in this area and feel I'm finally ready to embark on this journey.

In order to put God first I have had to make some hard choices... Although they may not seem hard on the outset, for me personally, I have found it hard.  In essence its about my desires verses Gods so I thought I'd write more about this subject, through my blog...

I found this chapter in the bible a great starting point for examining my sins and helping me to go forward with God.

Romans 6: ¹What shall we say then? Are we to continue in sin that grace may abound? ²By no means! How can we who died to sin still live in it? ³Do you not know that all of us who have been baptized into Christ Jesus were baptized into his death? ⁴We were buried therefore with him by baptism into death, in order that, just as Christ was raised from the dead by the glory of the Father, we too might walk in newness of life.

 ⁵For if we have been united with him in a death like his, we shall certainly be united with him in a resurrection like his. ⁶We know that our old self^[a] was crucified with him in order that the body of sin might be brought to nothing, so that we would no longer be enslaved to sin. ⁷For one who has died has been set free^[b] from sin. ⁸Now if we have died with Christ, we believe that we will also live with him. ⁹We know that Christ, being raised from the dead, will never die again; death no longer has dominion over him. ¹⁰For the death he died he died to sin, once for all, but the life he lives he lives to God. ¹¹So you also must consider yourselves dead to sin and alive to God in Christ Jesus.

 ¹²Let not sin therefore reign in your mortal body, to make you obey its passions. ¹³ Do not present your members to sin as instruments for unrighteousness, but present yourselves to God as those who have been brought from death to life, and your members to God as instruments for righteousness. ¹⁴For sin will have no dominion over you, since you are not under law but under grace.

Slaves to Righteousness

 ¹⁵What then? Are we to sin because we are not under law but under grace? By no means! ¹⁶Do you not know that if you present yourselves to anyone as obedient slaves,^[c] you are slaves of the one whom you obey, either of sin, which leads to death, or of obedience, which leads to righteousness? ¹⁷But thanks be to God, that you who were once slaves of sin have become obedient from the heart to the standard of teaching to which you were committed, ¹⁸and, having been set free from sin, have become slaves of righteousness. ¹⁹ I am speaking in human terms, because of your natural limitations. For just as you once presented your members as slaves to impurity and to lawlessness leading to more lawlessness, so now present your members as slaves to righteousness leading to sanctification.

 ²⁰ For when you were slaves of sin, you were free in regard to righteousness. ²¹ But what fruit were you getting at that time from the things of which you are now ashamed? For the end of those things is death. ²²But now that you have been set free from sin and have become slaves of God, the fruit you get leads to sanctification and its end, eternal life. ²³ For the wages of sin is death, but the free gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord.

Traditions

I wrote previously about 'traditions' throughout this blog but thought I would go more in depth about why I feel they're so important.  I feel that traditions are a really important tool in creating childhood memories, that you return to as adults.  I can remember always opening our stockings on mum and dads bed at Christmas. We always got up early and we always commenced present opening (downstairs round the tree) after mum and dad had made their cup of tea.  We all sat round as mum handed out the presents and it was great to watch others, as well as, receive presents.  I look back at these memories with fondness.  Whether its intentional or not, family traditions happen.  Whether its the big events like Christmas or just the everyday like meal times, when and where and with whom, you eat.

When we got married and had our children, we then had to start working out our own family traditions.  Jon likes to open Christmas presents in the afternoon and for me that would be torture! to have our meals together or in front of the tv.. These little details seem irrelevant but shape family life. 

We chose to look at our traditions first - how we live the everyday and the big events in our lives.

Neither of us were brought up in a christian household and it wasn't until after N, son number 2, that Jon became a christian and us a 'christian household'.  We have not had a christian upbringing modelled to us and now we are raising up 4 boys to be godly men.  Where can we start?  I think firstly we have to remember that it is God alone who saves.  He chooses who He saves, its not through our works.  We can pray for our children to have salvation and to know Jesus.  Learning that God is in control does not mean to have the attitude - well it doesn't matter then, what will be will be. God is in control of life and death. He chose to bless us with the gift of children and we can direct and train them to know Him for Gods glory.  Parents are Gods chosen way to bring children to Him, so in raising up our boys we need to make the most of each opportunity to live out our faith and teach our boys.  I know through being a child, its not what your parents say but how they live it out, that is remembered.  So raising our sons is not about just simply telling them what to do, following the latest parenting trend or making them grind away at the bible but for us to be following Christ, to be humble and showing them how we grow in faith. Being a christian and following God is exciting, being on a mission is exciting, this excitement whether things are going well or not, should be evident and they should be aware it is for them too.

It is a massive responsibility, being a parent and being a 'Godly' parent can give rise to unrealistic expectations for yourselves and for your children.  It can be easy to turn legalistic or think you're in control of them but then we wouldn't be showing the grace of God in our lives.  I think if you're wholeheartedly following God then this will be evident in how you raise your children.  There are so many books on parenting available its easy to get lost and not know where to start. The place we found easy to start our christian parenting journey was through our traditions - traditions teach and our children remember them. Also they're great fun to do and plan out. I like this book by Noel Piper and it inspired us to think and plan out our own traditions.

Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it.- Proverbs 22:6

Birthday time again!

My little J is 4! I love planning and thinking about my childs birthday.  I really enjoy celebrating the day they were born, remembering what precious gifts they are!

J decided he would like to go to the beach for his birthday, with family and just a couple of friends.  We hired a beach hut, prayed for good weather and had a great day.

In our family, we ask the birthday child what present they would like, how they would like to celebrate their birthday, the cake they would like and they get to choose the meals for the day.  This is our tradition.  The boys always look forward to it.  As Jon was working away we chose to celebrate J's birthday on the weekend.  We opened presents and decorated the house with banners and balloons (decorating the house has also become part of the tradition).  He wanted a sweetie cake so I made one for him.  Birthday child chooses/helps design their birthday cake.  We had a great day, we built sandcastles, collected shells and played in the freezing water followed by some birthday treats and cakes in the hut.

On the actual day, J opened all his cards and a couple of presents we had saved for him.  He chose the breakfast (malties sprinkled with jelly babies) and we all prayed thanks for him and told him something we loved about him.  Thankfully he chose a normal lunch and we had cheesey pasta for dinner (the current boys favourite meal) We made a chocolate cake in the afternoon which he had for pudding, along with the traditional candles.  He went to bed feeling really loved which is what we wanted to achieve. Its not about expensive gifts or elaborate parties, just simple fun and love!

Here we go again!

The summer holidays went quickly and I really enjoyed them. I loved having fun days out with my boys and loved having my husband home for 2 weeks. The last week of the holidays I tried to have as many lazy days as possible and get myself planning and thinking about the weeks ahead.  I didn't want to feel sad that the holidays were over but try and look forward to whats to come.

September is often a time of new beginning, new school term new class etc, which in 'mummy world' means new friends and helping your children deal with changes (as well as dealing with them yourself).  Whilst we were away at Westpoint - Newfrontiers camping weekend with our church - we really felt God asking us to examine where we were at and to push forward in Him.  Terry Virgo gave a preach on stepping out of Babylon - stepping out from the culture around us - and to live for God.  I can't actually explain it all and give it the justice it deserves, so please click here to listen to the sermon.

My husband and I really felt challenged about what we have been putting first in our lives.  We want to make a change and consciously put God first.  We believe in God and Jesus, yet how we have spent our time would not suggest this, we can do more.  We have decided that we will have no TV except for 2 nights a week (one for ironing night and the other for relaxing too) so that we can make more time for God, one another and the things we actually want to do.  Managing our time well is our first step (plus not feeding our mind with TV and feeding it with Gods word is certainly a bonus!)  So our new beginning is to start to learn more about God and His will for us.

This hasn't been easy.  Since we've been back, Jon has been away, a week at a time with work, but we still press on knowing we have a loving and gracious God.  For the children... Well first day back at school has been filled with nasty rain and wind, (enough to make anyone head for the duvet) but to school they went and drenched is what we became. They had some wobbles but on the whole OK, just like us.

So here we go again, a new season and time to go deeper with God!

Holiday scrapbook part 2