The Home...

I have called this the Home rather than the House, as the house is all about the structure and the home is about the work I do in it daily. 

The home - some of us like it tidy, clean and organised all the time, others not so.  I am someone who falls into the first category.  I like my home to smell nice and I like it to be clean - dirt is the enemy.  I don't like dust, smears, fingerprints or crumbs.  I would be more than happy living in a showroom surrounded by nice things, puffed up cushions, homely touches (thinking shabby chic vintage look) and beautiful art work.  That would be my 'ideal' of how my home should look. 

However, I want a home with a heart.  I really want my home to be a place where you can relax, have friends over, a place where celebrations and fun happen, good memories are made, a place where you feel welcome and can be yourself.  Unfortunately my 'sterile show home' ideal and the heart for my home don't really mix...

As you know, I live in a house of 4 boys plus one husband (who I will class as a 'not so') so the reality of living in a show home, is really just not reality for me.  I find it really hard not to give in to my urge of wanting everything in the home 'my way'.  The decor etc is usually left to me to decide.  I have a design background so I can often dream up and design beautiful things, however keeping them that way, doesn't happen naturally and needs a lot of cleaning/maintenance.  Whilst part of me would like this to be my main responsibility, so I can live in organised, beautiful cleanliness.  I am not called to be 'caretaker' of a home but am called to be a Godly woman, wife and mother.  Whilst working at home is part of my calling (my work) it is not to be to the detriment of everything else.  I have to get my priorities right.

I have spent many times worrying or feeling anxious over the state of the cleanliness/tidiness of my house.  I just hate mess and dirt but its killing me trying to do all this and still be everything else I am meant to be.  I sort counsel from the Bible and a Titus 2 woman.  I am to submit to my husband and this is not important to him, so I can be freed from this.  He would rather I spent my time doing other things.  Having a spotless home is a very low priority for him.  I have found it really hard to let go but as I read my bible I realised laying down my life for Christ, for me meant laying down my wants and desires in this area.  I know that by laying this down and serving my family (whilst feels completely strange) honours God.  In this I can also receive freedom from the burden of keeping things spotless and enjoy what I have, my husband and children.  Seasons change, and one day I'll be in the season where I will have more time for the aesthetics of the home, but for now I need to enjoy and pay attention to this season.

As this feels a bit new for me - learning to enjoy this freedom, I spoke with a lady who I felt has a great balance in the home.  She may describe herself as 'sloppy' but I think she has a great healthy perspective on the home.  I spoke to her about her standards and how its worked out through the week.  This has really helped me to have a new approach to my home, along with lots of prayer and bible reading.

I remember reading once, that we all apparently crave after that perfect home but actually its a craving for God, as one day we will be in His perfect home.

Luke 9:23 And he said to all, "If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me.