Well it will soon be son number 2s birthday! I am a bit behind in preparations this year with regards to presents so i took a morning visit to Toys r us. I asked my son what he would like for his birthday and he informed me 'I'd really like some more weapons and a light sabre' This is so 'not' me. With my shopping trolley of weaponry, I saw a little book that I would have really enjoyed playing with as a young girl. It was a cut out paper doll dress up in bridal theme - fills all my girly passions and delights. However this would fill my sons with complete disgust!
I was there looking at all these different guns, cross bows and swords, trying to determine which will be the most fun and not poke out too many eye balls or cause too much devastation in the home - thinking about how I arrived here. He really wants to be a spy and loves the notion of good verses evil. He likes to play superhero and is very much a boys boy in terms of how he plays. He also has a very soft and loving side, which is not so easily seen - as he's running around bustling with energy at being a superhero! But he is really sensitive and considerate to others - he may not always show this in the best way but it is there. He enjoys hugs and kisses, they just come with heaps of energy and squeezes.
I remembered back to when i had my first child and how different my opinions about boys and how they should be raised were. I was raising my son vegetarian and how much I hated superhero and gun type toys. I did not want to raise a violent over-active child and felt this type of play was the cause. I thought it would numb their mind towards violence and make them insensitive. I wanted a son that would quietly play and be interested in a wide range of (what i deemed suitable) activities. Well I soon came to realise, in raising my sons, I do not get to choose who they are - yes we guide them as parents but God has chosen them and made them who they are. I do not want to be an over controlling mother (believing i am author of their souls) by not allowing Gods design and potential to be reached. We now all eat meat (in fact its getting them to eat the veggies that can be harder) and have learned to accept boys (mainly son number 2) really enjoy being superhero and actually they get a lot of joy from these games. I can see their moral compass, their need for justice and helping others through their play. I know they need lots of energy and will eventually learn how to harvest that for their careers/future/daily lives.
I do not know the plans God has for my children but through them I have learnt to humble my opinions and submit them to God. Through my sons i have learnt more about men and biblical masculinity. I have learnt and read more about this, so I can understand and raise them up to be men of God. Its also helped me to appreciate and understand my husband more. Jon is more than happy to play the rough and tumble games, enjoys a game of Nerf wars, to him it is natural - for me i need to learn. Also I have learnt its not their toys that matter or influence the type of person they will become. I am learning more about parenting and how playing is very important but just a small part of a much bigger picture. So although I would really like to get son number 2 some more 'appropriate educational' toys, I am at the checkout buying an array of weaponry - a machine gun or 2, with grace and love.
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